strange, unexpected delights

www.leelanaunews.com

posted on October 14, 2007 at 1:06 am,

S-B icon heading to Columbus Zoo

Anna, the maternal primate who has "watched over" pedestrians in Suttons Bay for the past eight years, is moving south...Now, she’ll have a new home at the Columbus Zoo.



I've had quite the eventful month, due to a much needed and appreciated transfer at work, an upteenth change of living situation (affecting both roommate and neighborhood association), and; I've met someone.

Dee and I went to flamingo gaze at the local fair and it slipped my mind to ask her whether she liked the poison dart frogs, or otters, or chatty monkeys best. (Prime example: "Mama--possibly another office worker deciding to take a breather, and realizing the joys of bringing an easily amused date--look at the gorilla. He's dead.""No, honey, he's sleeping. Watch his belly [move up and down]. See, he's resting.")

Positively nauseating, eh?

Love me some straight dope

Dear Cecil:

I've always wondered where the wonderful American expression "Indian giver" originated.  Is an Indian giver one who: (1) as an Indian, gives you something and then takes it back, (2) gives things to Indians, or (3) gives away Indians?  Your insight is greatly appreciated.

--Michael W., Jacksonville, Florida

(September 16, 1988)

Dear Michael:
This whole thing is so ironic it's an instant cure for pernicious anemia.  "Indian" was once used by the white man as an all-purpose adjective signifying "bogus" or "false", owing to the supposedly low morals of the red man.  Thus you had "Indian summer," false summer late in the year; "Indian corn" and "Indian tea," cheap substitutes for products the original colonists had known back in England; and "Indian giver," someone who gives you something and then takes it back.

But of course Europeans were the real Indian givers, repeatedly promising the Indian reservations by treaty and then stealing them back once valuable farmland or minerals were found.  The term has thus inadvertently become an acid commentary on the character of its inventors.  I think it's poetic.


Dear Cecil:
You appear to be under the impression that Indian reservations were provided by the United States to Indians in treaties, and that the whites later "took back" the reservations. In fact, in the majority of cases, reservations are areas of the tribes' own homelands, usually very small by comparison to their original territory, which the Indians kept to themselves, while giving up the balance in the treaties. In legalese, the Indians "reserved to themselves" a portion of their lands, while granting the rest to the government.

While this distinction may seem like nitpicking, it is important, because most non-Indians perceive the special status of Indians tribes and their lands as gifts from the benevolent white father in Washington (at the resentful taxpayer's expense). In fact, neither their special status, which is sovereignty retained by the tribes, nor their reserved lands are gifts in any sense of the word.
--Anthony C., Mill Valley, California


Dear Anthony:
Point well taken. Thanks.



Dear Cecil:
I'm afraid you've goofed again. In a recent column you wrote, "The whole thing is so ironic it's an instant cure for pernicious anemia." I'm surprised you didn't know that pernicious anemia is caused by a deficiency in a protein called intrinsic factor which carries Vitamin B12 to the ileum, the last segment of the small intestine, where the complex binds to a receptor and is absorbed into the blood. No amount of iron would cure it but a good shot in the arm of B12 would do a lot of good. Would you please set the record straight?
--Larry G., junior, Northwestern University Medical School, Evanston, Illinois


Cecil replies:
Go away, kid, you bother me.

122
Emily Dickinson

A something in a summer’s Day
As slow her flambeaux burn away
Which solemnizes me.

A something in a summer’s noon —
A depth — an Azure — a perfume —
Transcending ecstasy.

And still within a summer’s night
A something so transporting bright
I clap my hands to see —

Then veil my too inspecting face
Lets such a subtle — shimmering grace
Flutter too far for me —

The wizard fingers never rest —
The purple brook within the breast
Still chafes it narrow bed —

Still rears the East her amber Flag —
Guides still the sun along the Crag
His Caravan of Red —

So looking on — the night — the morn
Conclude the wonder gay —
And I meet, coming thro’ the dews
Another summer’s Day!

FYI

Zanne plans to spend the summer months haunting my on-campus retreat as she hunts down public radio gigs in the city. Hence, my latest technicolour obsession features Worldly Redheads.

APRIL F%#@

1. What is your relationship status?
Am referencing "sexual orientation" here.

photobucket label "after going back and forth a few times"

2. What is your current mood?

3. Who is your Favorite Band/Artist?

Had a hard time coming up with an answer. Will a Rilo Kiley song from a mix that Zanne burned for me after I relocated to _____X_____ for grad school suffice? (The much cherished CD was later misplaced on an Alaskan Airlines cruiser. (Sh)it happens.

4. What is your [parents' plus sibling's] favorite movie?
October Sky

sigh, Jake Gyllenhaal






















Jake Gyllenhaal again ;)






















Jake and his late, great Brokeback Mountain co-star












5. What kind of pet do you have?
The low maintenance kind.
"th_Rock" kind.











6. Where do you live?
Apparently, "PacificBlue"























7. Where do you work?

8. What do you look like?
Only taller, still sporting a bowl haircut.












9. What do you drive?
an invisible dragon

10. What did you do last night?
Aaagh, are we there yet? This is why I don't represent the target populace for eHarmony matchmakers. What with my queerness and sunny disposition and all.

12. Describe yourself:
Done.

To mark progress at the grindstone

Six word MeMe instructions knabbed from Professional Mirror (aka Dr. Medusa)

1. Write your own six word memoir
2. Post it on your blog and include a visual illustration if you’d like
3. Link to the person that tagged you in your post and to this original post if possible so we can track it as it travels across the blogosphere {Tag}
4. Tag five more blogs with links {I'll pass}
5. And don’t forget to leave a comment on the tagged blogs with an invitation to play! {ibid}

She appreciated the birds and bees

Cafe Study Date

Gabrielle has disappeared on me to lounge singley on the black pleather loveseat in the back, while I decide to stay put at the table that we've crammed wtih laptops, smuggled ziploc bags of veggie chips, and a pricely bought plate of Today's Coffee House Special: housemade raspberry chiffon cake.

By August's close, she'll be heading for an East Coast post and Hello, if you keep comparing me to Kermit the Ribbit, who do you suppose is going to respond to long distance calls about that the peeps around you being all partnered to Professor Prince Charming (each harem consort sporting 100 precious tadpoles) and H-to-the-N-O you don't feel like lighting incense at your neighborhood temple. Come to think of it, it was only yesterday that you revealed a longterm Catholic affiliation, and didn't yer mom just ship you a basket of Easter treats over school break. I happen to prefer dark chocolate nibs over milk kisses myself. Mmm...

Ahem. For the record, soon after Phoney Girlfriend blotted her Research-1 contract we decided to eat out at an Asian fusion restaurant where I drank excess sake and inaugurated my first epic hangover in, like, decades. Sure I'll check out your guestroom asap, Angel Face, despite the fact that your pet name for me sucks ass royally.

"Custom Designed Hawaiin Hibiscus" available for import from oceanfrontchocolates.com